Nothing I can do...

Something's happening in Makati again, seems like deja vu. I can imagine Cogie locked up in his room sitting by the window, staring at the world outside. He said he saw it when the mutiny happened, he saw a lot of accidents at the other side of the road from where he is. I wish I could talk to him to check if he's alright. I wanted so much to show him how much I care but I guess I have to wait for things to fall into place before I can get near him. You have no idea how much I want it, not at all. I have 3 Cogies in my Friendster but that doesn't give me an idea of what's real. I'm not confused, just clueless. It's impossible that he doesn't have an account because he has a computer in his room. I just don't know which... uhhh... Help? It was hard to sleep last night, just the thought of Katrina Halili being part of NAF is bothering me. She's so lucky she gets to hug him, and worse, lock lips with him and I dread that. I've watched a lot of lucky girls from showbiz kiss the lips I want to kiss myself. I could've been in their place, if I'd be given a chance, and I could be but then again, I have to wait. PGMA being ousted doesn't really bother me but live a life without having to look at those pair of pretty eyes will kill me. Yeah, I know I sound crazy but he's really one thing I care about. I can't help but imagine Lucy Torres' fairy tale love story happen to me. I would die very happy even if I'll be sent to hell. I don't wanna tell my friends about this because they'll probably just laugh at me, hearts out, big joke! Nah! But who cares. That's something they can't take from me, they'd just wish. Haha! I don't wanna talk about anything else right now. Yeah, exams are up already next week but I'll work on that later. : )