Not Over Yet

Am I over them?
I'm not over them.
Am I really over my LOVE?
I can't think straight,
'Cause I'm too busy thinking of them.
I'm not really over them...

I don't wanna be. The joys and frustrations of January 20th's concert can last me a lifetime, seems so. Two hours made up for the 10 years of tireless waiting, anticipating, and dreaming. They came to get me and caught me, now they're under my skin... Awww... I'm in love all over again! I'm writing my memory of that special day in a journal ang I'm putting it on my scrapbook, which I haven't started yet. I also included those of the other fans who were there. I envy those who went to stalk them the moment they landed to the day the took of again. I praying that they would be back, prayers and hardwork got me to the concert. I believe it can help me once again. I've always trusted the heavens though there are time that I forget. AMEN!

Someone ate what they said today. He was blaming me this morning for something I knew he was wrong about. Haha! Now, he knows! BUTI NGA SA'YO!

I seem to suck in school this time of the year. I feel lazy and rather go to sleep. I even quitted the band. I felt that I don't need to force myself into something that if I do something else instead of that will make me happier. I prefer sleeping than practicing. I've gotten over the pressure of having a band and try to impress people but end up shaming yourself. I've forgotten the feeling of being cool when people know you're into those band thingy. I also gotten over the impressions that singers are dumb. I don't look like a singer and I don't have to be. I'm happy with singing in my CONCIERTO SA BANYO (Haha... funny but true!), I even lock myself in my room just to sing like I was performing in a two-hour concert of my own. Those simple things that I've taken for granted and loss the interest of appreciating are some of the happiest moments of my being alone.

I've found my Neverland once again. I was slowly losing it as I was growing up. The toughest times that came upon me over the years almost made me forget. BSB was there to save me from the MAN that I was becoming. I'm growing up and going through a lot of changes and I could only imagine if they never came to be a part of my life. How would I be? I don't wanna be like the other people around me but little by little, I was becoming like one of them. Man, let's cut this. I don't wanna cry.

I'm happy and in love, and that's all that matters. My friends may feel left out because I'm backing out on what we planned but I'm too selfish to make other people happy before myself though I won't be too ungenerous to share the happiness I feel inside, the positive vibe and aura. OH, YEAH!

By the way, it's Nick's birthday tomorrow and they'd still be in Australia tomorrow. Lucky Australia! AJ celebrated in Japan but even so, Sammy celebrated his here. WHO'S SAMMY? One of the guys behind BSB's success, he's the Backstreet Band's bassist.

THIS KIND OF LOVE DOESN'T COME FROM JUST A TOUCH
NOR DOES IT COME FROM ANYTHING YOU CAN PAY FOR...
I WOULDN'T TRADE IT FOR ALL IN THE WORLD